Seeking Peace
adapted from my blog written in India, November 2007

"The people who are in the mad rush today increasing their wants senselessly suppose that they are enhancing their importance and knowledge. A day will come when they will exclaim, 'What have we been doing?' One after another, many civilizations have risen, flourished, declined and disappeared and in spite of their big boast of human progress, I am inclined to ask what will end all of this? Darwin's contemporary Wallace has said that despite the various discoveries and inventions during the past 50 years, the moral height of man hasn't increased even an inch. Tolstoy has said the same thing, Jesus, Buddha, prophet Muhammed all have said the same thing." Gandhi

This morning I was very concerned about getting to morning prayers. I heard a bell and got myself up. It was more difficult than usual, but I didn't think anything of it. I got ready and made my way to the gate. Locked. I had to wake the gatekeeper who sleeps in a chair in front of the dining room to open the gate. Since he is the one who also rings the bell for prayers, I found it odd that he had gone back to sleep before unlocking the gate and so soon after ringing the bell. He let me out and relocked the gate which I also found odd. I walked across the street only to find that gate locked, too. Strange! I looked at my watch. 4:17 am. I was a half-hour early! What to do? I sat down and thought about sleeping. I thought about meditating. The ashram dog, who is quite flea-ridden, was there to protect me and alert me when people passed. Eventually, I heard footsteps approaching behind me. They reached the gate and a loud, "EH!". I stood quickly and said, "I am here for prayers." He said, "Oh, yes, come in. There is crazy woman just over there. I thought you her." I made my way back. Then the bells rang. I don't know what bell I had heard originally, but it wasn't this one. Prayers were done on Gandhi's porch in Hindu kirtan, the Lord's Prayer, Muslim, and again Hindu with the last one ending in one of my favorites, "Om shanti, shanti, shanti (Om= the sound of creation, shanti = peace). I actually joined the chanting for that.

I returned to my room. It was 5 am. The doors were locked!!! I think Joy (one of my roommates) had locked them after I left. What to do? I practiced yoga on the porch for a bit. I heard drumming. Now ya'll know I am a sucker for a good drum beat. If the gate was still unlocked, I had to find where this divine sound was coming from. It seriously sounded like a high school drumline practicing for the homecoming game! My good fortunate allowed me to start down the road. It was dark and I had no identification, only a flashlight with me. People said good morning and how are you as we passed on the darkened street. I was trying not to be nervous or scared. I passed a tree with a great deal of commotion happening in it and found it strange, but continued on. A man passed and said, "where are you going?" I said I don't know. I asked what the drumming was. "A marriage, I think". Yep, I quickened my pace. I would see this wedding! I passed what looked like an alley next to a building with the Muslim morning prayers happening and there was the procession. I walked down the alley and then found a safe place to the side to watch. A group of beautifully dressed women were in front, then the band consisting of 5-7 drummers and a couple of trumpets, followed by an SUV followed by the bride and I assume family. I followed for awhile before walking back to the ashram. By the time I got there, I was hearing chanting over the loud speaker, so I had to go in search. It's still very dark outside. I went in the opposite direction. I ended up in a squatter village. They defecate in the street. I gave up on finding that loudspeaker and returned again to the ashram. I did some more yoga as I watched the sun rise and then sat in meditation with my eyes open watching the sun come up in the most beautiful shades of pink. I love that time of day!

I was hearing boys in front of the ashram so I had to go see. They were taunting the local crazy woman, getting her to chase them. It was odd. The three men who knew "25% English" tried to hold a conversation with me.
Your name?
You marriage?
Why not?
Boyfriend?
Why not?
Your age?
NO!!! I think you have skin of 20 year old. (Yes, the sun was up at this point, but no make-up and the lovely humidity kissed bed head probably helped)
What is your occupation?

One of them does patient supplies at the hospital and the other supplies drinks (alcohol, I think). Ages 33, 27, and 20. The oldest has 3 kids and the middle has one infant. Kids were coming from the squatter village and taunting the woman, yelling, "Poo, poo, poo". Thinking it was Hindi, I had no idea what it meant until she chased them with something balled up in her hand and began throwing it at the kids. It was poo. I had no idea if it was from livestock or humans. Norbu walked out and watched with me for a bit. I knew it wasn't right but I didn't know what to do. He eventually walked down the road. Then came our school president, Dan'l. He watched and I explained what I had ben watching and said, this isn't right but I don't know what to do. He said, "Cruel, absolutely cruel." He spoke something in Hindi and everyone disappeared. He walked over to the woman and began to speak to her. I returned back to my room to prepare for the day.

At 7 am, I went back to the ashram to photograph the property, then started walking to see a temple we'd passed last night. I pass Dan'l who is walking towards the Asram, the woman behind him calling out. He stops to talk to me. She grabs his arm briefly, reaches in her sari and pulls out a small pouch. She unwraps some coins and presses it into his hand. He says that is very generous. I had to have been looking at him like, what the hell?! He said, I gave her a large amount of money and she had to give me something in return. I was speechless. He began to walk away. I went in search of my temple.

Later that day in class, we were talking about thermodynamics and energy. Dan'l made the point taht social change happens within the margins of society. The "bad" sector of society makes up a small portion of the population and those who want to change for the good and act upon that desire make up a small portion. We must contain the bad and increase the good for social change to occur. He then said he had an example of cruelty and how that energy must be contained. "Grab your paper and pen and follow me", he said. We walked out to stand in front of her "home", a abandoned bus stop that is concrete with no roof. She was standing watching us, yelling at the passerby's. "Ah, our friend from this morning", I said. He smiled and said, yes. I stood directly in front of him, maybe 6 feet away. My fellow students surrounding us. She walked up and faced him, maybe a foot away. "Whatever happens and whatever she does to me, DO NOT watch her, look at me and listen to me!" were his instructions. She had a ball of dung in her hands. She was balling it, tossing it between hands. He started explaining what had happened this morning. She dropped the dung. She began blessing him, starting at his feet and moving up, periodically "cleansing" him with the dung. He explained he'd talked to her and she'd told him she just wanted to be a good person and nobody understood her. He'd given her 50 rupee ($1.31) and she said she could not accept it. After much discussion, she'd pulled from her sari a 2 pence coin, wrapped in cloth, and gave it to him. By now, we had a HUGE crowd of locals staring, wondering why he was allowing her to touch him, bless him, and stand with us, why we were all there, what was happening. Dan'l was becoming very angry as he spoke. We are 50 feet from the place Gandhi practices compassion and nonviolence. This would not have happened when he was alive. Yet, the people living inside of there and teaching his works are not living them to let this happen.

I stood there with tears falling. I had stood and watched her being harassed and did nothing. The example that Dan'l gave us strengthened my belief that ahimsa (nonviolence) must start from within. Each of us is connected. When you suffer, I suffer, we all suffer. When that women is taunted and has rocks thrown at her, we all share in her suffering.

I don't know that ahimsa will ever reign the world, but I do believe it is a conscious way of living that we should all strive towards. The bottom line is that we all bleed the same color. I believe that when we truly listen to the stories of others, we create a space for dignity, respect, and compassion to gestate into transparency and trust. Until we begin to recognize this complex web, the cycle of violence will continue.

Become aware of your listening skills. A workshop I attended this summer taught me to not say a word when the person was talking or even when they finished to provide space for the person to say all they need to say. In the uncomfortable silence, often people will say what they are really thinking and that is where dialog begins. Move forward from that space with compassion, respect and dignity. What bothers you in that moment may be a mirror to what bothers you within your self. Take the opportunity to explore that discomfort to create inner peace for outward change.

Wendy Reese for Peace in the City